Articles are available for reprint as long as the author is acknowledged: Domenick J. Maglio Ph.D.

Tuesday, July 18, 2017

PARENTAL SACRED DUTY




PARENTAL SACRED DUTY
By Domenick J. Maglio PhD. Traditional Realist

Parents are very concerned about the schools their children attend. They want the best education their money can buy. The rich and famous put their child in the finest, most exclusive schools. Parents often drive their child across town to place them in the best public school available. Almost all parents want a quality education for their children. 

These parents understand that their children have to learn an incredible amount of academic material, thinking skills as well as appropriate behaviors to be successful in life. The major issue that many parents often forget is that they are the most influential teacher the child will ever have. It is a responsibility they should not take lightly. 

Training one’s child should start in infancy or as soon as possible. Waiting until the infant enters preschool often leaves the child behind others who have the advantage of parents being more proactive during this period. Parents are not even requiring their toddlers to speak the appropriate word before receiving an object they want. 

With the convenience of disposable diapers parents are being lulled into merely changing a diaper instead of completing the potty training regime. This is the reason many parents are satisfied with their child not being potty trained before the age of 3, 4 or even 5 years-of age instead of the time honored 18 months to 2 years-old time periods that was the norm for generations. This lack of beginning the potty training process on the proper time has caused many of them to be diagnosed with a mental health label that would have been avoided with proper and appropriate parenting.

The same bypassing of sensitive periods for children’s training is causing unnecessary problems.  Children need a consistent schedule to thrive. The expectation for the child to eat various foods is not being demanded. The structure for the child to go to bed and wake up at a particular time is not being followed. This structure is necessary for a healthy environment in a child’s daily development. 

Compounding this is modern parents inability to set up a consistent schedule for their child due to their harried life. Their work is often demanding of their time and energy. By the time they get home there is little flexibility to do spontaneous things with the child. Many special trips are left for the weekend or days off. These are quality times such as visits to the park, special social play-dates with friends, and visits to friends and relatives. There is little opportunity for one-on-one training time. 

Quantity time is a radically different occasion. The parent is spending time with the child with no particular object in mind. The child is in a comfortable, safe environment. There is no script and the parent has the opportunity to intervene spontaneously. “You should be more gentle with the cat.” “You need to put away these things before taking out others.” The parent is able to see how the child thinks and acts in everyday settings. The parent is spending “quantity time” with the child and learns through their own interaction with the child rather than a sterile report from a childcare worker. The parents and child have time to bond allowing both to better understand each other. Much of the teaching and learning takes place during these spontaneous moments when the need presents itself.  These are teachable moments that happen unpredictably and make a significant contribution to the child’s future. Quality time cannot be overestimated as an irreplaceable opportunity to impact a child’s development.

Parents are the ultimate authority figures and teachers of the child. No one can replace that role. The child is an indicator of his parent’s involvement with him. Mannerisms, thoughts, speech, facial expressions are shaped by the parents. There is strong biological connection that cannot be discounted or underestimated. 

When parents relinquish the responsibility as parents their child suffers in numerous ways. They have no security that the parents will always be there for them. They become open to negative people who do not have their best interest at heart. These children often become a burden and a blemish on the family and community.

The parent’s sacred duty is to be there protecting and preparing their child to be the best he/she can be throughout life. Ideally the parents will be committed to the child for the rest of their life. This gives continuity from one generation to another. It cements the most important social unit, the family.

 It goes without saying that parents often play a pivotal role throughout their children’s lives. They should always be there to lend support and to assist their adult child’s journey. Often the parents’ most important legacy is their child and family, which takes time and effort to accomplish. 

Society prospers when children become high functioning citizens. Parents are essential in raising their children. No government program can replace dedicated fathers and mothers in any society. Parents who do their sacred duty deserve the appreciation of all of us.



Domenick Maglio, PhD. is a columnist carried by various newspapers, an author of several books and owner/director of Wider Horizons School, a college prep program. Dr. Maglio is an author of weekly newspaper articles, INVASION WITHIN  and a new just published book, entitled, IN CHARGE PARENTING In a PC World. You can visit Dr. Maglio at www.drmaglio.blogspot.com.

Tuesday, July 11, 2017

IN THE USA WE ARE NOT EQUAL BUT HAVE OPPORTUNITY TO BETTER OURSELVES

IN THE USA WE ARE NOT EQUAL BUT HAVE OPPORTUNITY TO BETTER OURSELVES
By Domenick J. Maglio PhD. 

There is not anyone who can think or see who believes everyone is equal. Everyone is unique including so called “identical twins.” Yet we are indoctrinated with the slogan, “everyone is equal.” People range from short to tall, beautiful to ugly, bright to slow but all can equally become the best they can be by maximizing their strengths and minimizing their short comings.

America, being a nation of immigrants, did not attempt to limit or prescribe what a person should become according to family status or any other criteria. In our capitalist economy, the merit of the person’s performance for the most part determines his financial compensation. Doing a competent job not who you know is more important to maintaining employment. An employee’s productive value to the business is the key to remaining and advancing in a position. 

Of course internal politics plays a role in advancement specifically in large corporations. Our economic system in the USA is not flawless but does offer numerous pathways to upward mobility for people who are willing to apply effort and concentration to their assignments. In start-up businesses the boss is inspired mostly by his own vision, initiative and devotion to the business. Commitment, perseverance and sweat go a long way in developing a viable business.

The incredible number of opportunities and success stories of people picking themselves up by their bootstraps is no longer enough to persuade many in this society of capitalism’s value. Currently too many Americans are accepting the utopian “easy way” notion that they are entitled to whatever they desire. According to this absurd idea, since we are all born human each of us deserves an equal portion of the economic pie. They insist on this even when they are not contributing anything to the making of the pie. “Equal” to them means having the same material benefits as anyone else without having to earn them. This is socialistic hocus pocus that has never worked and will not in the future. Yet most products of the university (students) are being converted to be proponents of this socialistic/communistic continually failed system. 

 Our universities and progressive media are using their position to constantly exploit the inequities between minority groups to alienate students. They do not appreciate our free market economy and the greatness that our country has accomplished. They do not view  America as the land of opportunity. Instead, professors incessantly twist information to create a horrendous narrative that white males, the 1%-ers, are oppressing the poor criminals, feminists, gender confused, homosexuals and Islamic people of the world. The pitting of minority groups against each other has resulted in deranged and angry agitators. These mentally unbalanced dreamers are looking for the magical utopian solution offered by the elite, all-wise teachers to solve all their personal issues. The gullible but arrogant students complain they need higher compensation for their menial jobs and should start at the top position as they have college degrees. More politically radical students hide their identity behind black clothing and masks and violently destroy private property of the corporate world and at times their own community. These criminal malcontents want the rapid transformation of America into a centrally controlled economy and state.

Destroying anything is easier than building and maintaining something. Being envious of what others have built is foolish and non productive. It results in a life of disappointment and misery which culminates in indiscriminate violence ending in political chaos and ruin. The French Revolution and many others throughout history ended in horror instead of the magnificent privileges and material goods they were promised.

In our nation self-centered and self-important university professionals. and media elites preach and divide our country into have and have-nots. This strategy is employed to foment hostility and hatred to eventually destroy our constitutional republic.

This nightmare scenario might sell in a college setting with naive, ignorant and inexperienced adolescents and self-important adults but is not being bought by the bulk of middle class American citizens. The USA is still the beacon of freedom to most mainstream American citizens and the rest of freedom loving people around the world.

Just look at the different people from all over the world willing to pay their way with as much as a half million dollars of their own money or risk their lives to illegally cross the border to become one of us. People around the world are making a strong statement with their feet and money to become part of our country. Improving oneself and carving out one’s own sanctuary world is a sign of wisdom for these courageous individuals. 

If any American does not understand the obvious real greatness of America, the only thing they have to do is travel and experience the difficulties of expressing one’s beliefs and ideas in other nations. The difficulty of moving up the employment ladder is easily realized by conversing with bright and energetic people who are restricted by their government regulations from starting their own businesses. 

Once you realize the difficulty for the people of other countries to deal with these two social issues, you will appreciate the greatness of our nation. America is still the land of opportunity and freedom. 

Domenick Maglio, PhD. is a columnist carried by various newspapers, an author of several books and owner/director of Wider Horizons School, a college prep program. Dr. Maglio is an author of weekly newspaper articles, INVASION WITHIN  and a new just published book, entitled, IN CHARGE PARENTING In a PC World. You can visit Dr. Maglio at www.drmaglio.blogspot.com.



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Tuesday, July 04, 2017

NOT KEEPING ONE'S WORD DESTROYS RELATIONSHIPS AND COMMUNITY ADHESIVENESS

NOT KEEPING ONE’S WORD DESTROYS RELATIONSHIPS AND COMMUNITY ADHESIVENESS
BY Domenick J. Maglio PhD. Traditional Realist


People are dependent and interdependent on others. The infant is totally dependent on a caretaker to survive. As the child physically matures, the need for a caretaker decreases although psychologically, emotionally socially and safety issues still impact the chances to remain alive and develop into a healthy person. A person needs to have a sense of security and faith in the world around them to blossom.
Obviously parents or another caretaker who stops feeding, protecting or loving the child increases the possibility of the child not prospering and even death. We have learned that children in institutions who are not physically held and caressed can die even when all the physical needs are met. This is called “marasmus.” This shows the importance of caring and stable personal relationships to people’s well-being and ability to function well.
There are too many individual casualties of dysfunctional families who have been neglected, abused or have had their lives shattered by their parents’ divorce. These parents did not keep their sacred word to remain in the marriage until “death does us part.” Divorce is the death of the family, and the eventual destruction of a child’s security. All the flowering rationalizations in the world cannot erase the ongoing pain an individual suffers for their parent’s self-centered breakup of the family.
Breaking of one’s word has significant negative impact on others. When a repairman tells us that we have a two-hour window when he will come, we plan around it. The person has to reschedule life to be there at a specific time so if the repairperson does not show up or give a timely call to reschedule the appointment we are rightfully upset. The customer feels that the individual repairman did not have the decency to call and inform them of his reasons for not showing up.
Being a person of one’s word currently has little dividends in a modern, anonymous society. Our communities currently are spread out in suburban and urban areas. We buy online or in large box stores that are often far from our homes. Our neighbors are not the people we usually interact with in doing business. We download Home Advisor when we need things done around the house.
Rarely do we personally know the person who comes to do the repair, or do they know us. Any person we do not know well can tell us any personal story as well as we can tell them. We have few clues to go on to determine a person’s character except their appearance. We have to accept them on faith.
The problem with the constant assault of people not keeping their word is it affects the public perception of others. It forces most people to ignore this appalling, discourteous and rude behavior. There are too many people resorting to lazy passive lying. The more dishonorable behavior takes place without stigma attached, and no

backlash. This acceptance of not following through on one’s word is going to become more common until it is considered normal.
Once it is widely practiced, an honest person becomes very tempted to do the same, as it is easier not to keep one’s word. Eventually those who keep their word regardless of how hard they struggle their will power to do the right thing dwindles. These people of their word surrender to the easy way of lying to themselves and others.
As the process of lying grows, principled people lose faith in others and themselves to make honest commitments to others and fulfill them. Relationships become harder to forge and keep. Entire communities becomes distrustful of each other, making business and assisting others less likely and more difficult because they do not want to have a shattering let down of despair and depression.
Without individuals going out of the way to keep their integrity by following through on their word, relationships and eventually communities’ adhesiveness erodes and dissolves into personal and community chaos.
The same phenomena can happen in reverse. When the society recognizes and rewards honest citizens who go out of their comfort zone to assist others this behavior will become contagious. We witness this interesting reaction with the campaign of “acts of kindness”.
“Keeping one’s word” may not be as dramatic as acts of kindness although it is a character trait that is indispensable in establishing a solid and kind foundation for relationships in the community.
Domenick Maglio, PhD. is a columnist carried by various newspapers, an author of several books and owner/director of Wider Horizons School, a college prep program. Dr. Maglio is an author of weekly newspaper articles, INVASION WITHIN and a new just published book, entitled, IN CHARGE PARENTING In a PC World. You can visit Dr. Maglio at www.drmaglio.blogspot.com. 

Tuesday, June 20, 2017

WORK MAKES YOU A SLAVE OR SETS YOU FREE

WORK MAKES YOU A SLAVE OR SETS YOU FREE
By Domenick J. Maglio PhD. Traditional Realist

Large segments of our society believe any form of work is beneath them. Some view the need to work as an insult to their intelligence. Only people with serious mental deficiencies should be given menial,repetitive mental or physical tasks. Individuals like them should be encouraged and paid for their thoughts and artistic ability.

The high self-esteem, entitlement and constant exposure of socialistic indoctrination at our universities and the elite media has rendered “work” as a “four-letter word.” This cultural thinking process has impact not only the “millennial” generation but also many citizens who think any form of effort is something to avoid. Parent’s inheritance, educational credentials, and the nation’s welfare safety net according to them should freely supply ample resources to make savings and employment unnecessary in this modern era. The elite culture is supposed to encourage the progressive recognition of their high mental functions and make the world a better place.

This socialistic ideal of taking care of everyone’s needs through automation of industry, for letting people be happily free has resulted in the direct opposite reaction. Many people who are “trust fund” babies, welfare players, family spongers and too-early retirees are bored and depressed with their non-productive existence. There are too few challenges and sufficient structure in their life style. They have too much time for their minds to wander and do things that are self-destructive to fill the vacuum in their lives.

The concept that work is inherently good for the soul of a person has been erased from our cultural discourse. Completing a building project, exercising, gardening, painting or any other endeavor after one has put in physical effort and attention does have beneficial tangible rewards of seeing and experiencing the positive results of our labor.  Many intellectual activities are frustrating as they are abstract and cannot be seen or felt.

When a person develops the motivation, skills, pride and courage to create things with their own being nothing can stop them from being a doer. Each knows he has the will and the ability to be a productive independent person.  These doers are not easy to intimidate, as they know they can survive by their own will power to do what is necessary and self gratifying. The person has reached a mental state of knowing he can be self reliant under almost any condition.

Instead of sitting back and complaining that they should be sharing the wealth of others, they should go to work to create their own assets. The Bible emphasized that work is liberating.  Proverbs 13:4- The soul of the sluggard craves and gets nothing, while the soul of the diligent is richly supplied.  Thessalonians 3:10-12- For even when we were with you, we would give you this command: If anyone is not willing to work, let him not eat. For we hear that some among you walk in idleness, not busy at work, but busybodies. Now such persons we command and encourage in the Lord Jesus Christ to do their work quietly and to earn their own living.

These individuals know they are not entitled to anything that belongs to someone else but are free to create. They realize that to be independent means a person needs to provide for himself for himself and family through his own free and honest labor. Their moral viewpoint is not to take but produce something of value.

People expecting others to do their bidding are vulnerable to become enslaved. By living on borrowed money (credit) many individuals are becoming owned by their employment, banks and government. These people are living above their means and are stuck. They have no courage to get off the treadmill.

The welfare route of playing the system has its own pitfalls to enslavement. At the beginning when the government is pushing their “new” give away program, benefits go up. As the Ponzi schemes rise to unsustainable levels the incentives decrease until the naïve (takers) have no other resource but to be dependent and enslaved by the ever-powerful state.

 These people are at the mercy of all-controlling totalitarian bureaucrats. The same undermining of the spirit of the person happens with these who turn to the mental illness agencies for drugs to feel better even though the side effects are killing their minds and bodies. Every time an individual sells his soul for a handout, the spirit of the person is weakened and eventually destroyed.

Remaining free takes making hard choices. When most around you are taking short cuts to get what they want, a thoughtful person should look at the downside of each decision. Being seduced by offers that have long-term negative consequences, such as criminal schemes, drugs and free government money, has serious negative effects. The price a person pays for something should not threaten their long-term ability to remain a free, vibrant, thinking and acting individual. Short cuts to a good existence are an illusion. Loss of one’s personal dignity is much too high a price for temporary material benefits.

A person should to be self-reliant as it will set them free and keep them free.


Domenick Maglio, PhD. is a columnist carried by various newspapers, an author of several books and owner/director of Wider Horizons School, a college prep program. Dr. Maglio is an author of weekly newspaper articles, INVASION WITHIN  and a new just published book, entitled, IN CHARGE PARENTING In a PC World. You can visit Dr. Maglio at www.drmaglio.blogspot.com.








Tuesday, June 06, 2017

GIVING ADMINISTRATORS AND TEACHERS POWER TO ACCOMPLISH

GIVING ADMINISTRATORS AND TEACHERS POWER TO ACCOMPLISH
By Domenick J. Maglio PhD. Traditional Realist

In any group a leader rises to the top where even a group of peers playing games on a regular basis without adult supervision will organize themselves. Before the advent of electronic devices, children played outdoors and chose teams to play sports. They were not just standing on the corner only moving their fingers on electronic games. One youngster took the initiative, set up a time, made sure the equipment was available as was a venue and arranged for everyone to arrive at a certain time to play ball. This person was the leader, the person in charge. This same process happens when a teacher assigns a class project. One person takes the leadership role to insure that the project is done on time.

This informal or formal process exists in any type of group. The business owner begins with a vision, has the power to hire, fire and allocate resources as he or she sees fit. These powers are essential to create a team that works together to navigate the ship to its destination that the captain has determined. When the captain loses power a mutiny may occur. This is the same in any organization.

In today’s public education bureaucratic maze the power resides primarily in Washington, D.C. or the state capital, and trickles down to the individual schools. By the time it reaches the local schools the administrator, assistant administrators and teaching staff are all directed from above about their responsibilities. They learn the methods to use but do not possess the power to alter how it gets done. They have no latitude to be more efficient and meet the needs of the students in the classroom. These school officials have the responsibility without the authority to get the job done.

Looking up from the local school level, the individual administration, teachers or staff employees owe their positions and advancement to some important bureaucrat sponsor above them. The mission is not to inspire students, their families, or principals. Often the person to report to in the bureaucracy changes and so do the assignments, rules and expectations. Everyone in the system realizes the real power resides outside of the particular school.

The current mindset of the public school teacher is to control the potential classroom chaos and appease the parents. Many principals and their assistants evaluate the teachers on their ability to have the fewest complaints. The growth of individual students is not a focus in itself, rather only a part of a total class performance. The performance is defined by the latest fad and data indicators, which often changes. The data collected primarily are for the school system’s numbers to appear to improve, not for the student’s best interest.

This is the reason why the vast majority of teachers have strong misgivings about “No Child Left Behind”, and “Common Core.” The teachers quickly understand that they were relegated to robotic teaching specifically to a particular test. No longer is the teacher allowed to be a professional, creative person. Teachers were limited to reading and going over very specific material from the test practice booklet, using the exact wording, to prepare students to pass the test. This type of studying for comprehensive normative tests is more like a clerical position than a teaching one. There is little opportunity for the script readers to develop as teachers by practicing the art of teaching.

A teacher has to have the power to decide how the curriculum should be taught to become truly invested in the process of teaching. Being commanded to follow a script in a detailed manner is demeaning to a creative professional.  It is boring and a waste of time for the student’s learning. This “one size fits all” approach clearly demonstrates which students are the best prepared, academically, competitively and motivationally to follow directions, not who has improved the most. This high functioning group does well in this type of testing process.

When compared with students of the world the vast majority of American students do mediocre to poor. On the PISA (Program for International Student Assessment) the USA has scored 26th in math, 21st in science and 17th in reading, out of 34 developed nations.  This is even though the United States spends more money than almost every other country per student but is not providing a stellar education.

Present high school testing shows that at best we have a two tier educational system. The highest functioning students are well prepared. The much larger group of students does poorly regardless of the per capita spent. The public school establishment’s constant mantra “we need more money to improve education” is a farce.

What is needed are small schools where the principal has the power and authority to create high functioning schools. Giving local principals the responsibility to do the right thing without the power will keep our national education system as a second rate one.



Domenick Maglio, PhD. is a columnist carried by various newspapers, an author of several books and owner/director of Wider Horizons School, a college prep program. Dr. Maglio is an author of weekly newspaper articles, INVASION WITHIN  and a new just published book, entitled, IN CHARGE PARENTING In a PC World. You can visit Dr. Maglio at www.drmaglio.blogspot.com.























Wednesday, May 31, 2017

PARENTS DOING TOO MUCY AND REQUIRING TOO LITTLE

PARENTS DOING TOO MUCH AND REQUIRING TOO LITTLE
By Domenick J. Maglio PhD Traditional Realist

Modern parents are confused about their responsibility to assist their children in various situations. They feel responsible for their child’s homework when the child is in the younger grades putting greater effort into ensuring the child’s success in elementary grades. These parents realize the poor state of public schools. They hear stories of grade inflation, over testing, cheating, and lack of basic skills. Many even go so far as being frightened enough to actually do the child’s homework and instruct them in simple subject areas at home. These same parents are uncomfortable enforcing any significant consequences, which they gave to their children to teach them responsibility at home and in school.

Few of these parents attempt to involve their child in completing the work after they instruct them on the material. Most do not. Usually the child reluctantly participates in this ritual but only when the parent is looking over his shoulder. The parent-tutor does not trust the school’s preparation of their child to understand what he needs to do. Parents do not want their child to suffer the frustration of doing it on their own before helping them. Modern parents want to help their child do things with minimal effort from the child. This does not work for students to internalize the material.

In the higher elementary grades the students continue to expect their parents help. They are dependent on the parent tutoring them. The students concentrate on their studies only when an adult is right there. They have not been taught in any way to be a problem solver. Instead, most have learned to act helpless so their parents will take care of their responsibilities at school and home.

When the parent is notified that their child has not done his homework or has forged the parent’s signature for not doing an assignment or doing it poorly, the parent blames the school, not the child. These parents desire and even demand the school solve their child’s lack of motivation and poor academic skills. They only want to ensure their child’s success without having to expend time, energy and constantly repeat themselves until they become blue in the face.

Many modern parents are uncomfortable and even unwilling to jeopardize their children being temporarily upset with them. Most parents would like the school to take the responsibility to keep them on an academic track but often are unwilling to support the teachers. Their immature student’s choices become another reminder of the poor preparation and training of the youngster. They have not been trained to deal with temptations such as uncontrollable spending, drug and alcohol abuse or a daily unbalanced, unhealthy lifestyle. They use their self-centered feelings rather than logically examining the problem of consequences for their impulsive behavior.

These pathetic scenarios could be prevented by parents focusing their energy in the early years of the child’s life, developing good moral habits and skills to make them contributors rather than spoiled demanders and takers. This commitment cannot be underestimated in time and energy but pays incredible dividends in the family’s future. The present permissive-materialistic child rearing approach delivers crisis and headaches for many families as the child is supposed to mature. A child cannot mature if he is pampered into remaining a dependent invalid.

Understanding the importance of a strong, assertive parental hand in the early years parents have to demand the correct behavior to shape the child’s character. It requires parental supervision and follow-up instruction for the child to internalize the necessary skills and habits to tackle jobs and complete them in an efficient and timely manner.

These parents are not training them to be responsible, independent, moral people. Modern parents are not spending the necessary time teaching them basic good work habits. They do not realize their responsibility as a parent does not end with the early grades but continues not only until the legal age of 18 but until the parents are no longer able to function as independent adults.

The realization that the children are going to be part of the family for life changes everything. It is a powerful motivating factor in teaching the child to be independent rather than dependent on them. Dependent young adults become entitled, demanding their parents continued financial and emotional support for their out-of-control lifestyle. Parents become enablers of their children’s selfish and self-destructive behavior.

This takes a total commitment and effort of the family to realize the dividends of their work later on. Raising a healthy, educated, wise, well-balanced, successful adult is probably the greatest and most gratifying accomplishment in a parent’s life.


Domenick Maglio, PhD. is a columnist carried by various newspapers, an author of several books and owner/director of Wider Horizons School, a college prep program. Dr. Maglio is an author of weekly newspaper articles, INVASION WITHIN and a new just published book, entitled, IN CHARGE PARENTING In a PC World. You can visit Dr. Maglio at www.drmaglio.blogspot.com.