JUST SAY NO

JUST SAY NO

By Domenick J. Maglio Ph.D., Traditional Realist

We are becoming a society of excuses for our disastrous and ignorant decisions. Not only have we been indoctrinated with the notion of tolerance for all actions and every behavior, but tolerance has been sold as a super virtue that would make a Kumbaya world where everyone would accept and love all as equals. 

However, not everyone is equally worthy. There are some people who are nasty, dangerous and even evil. Many of these individuals do horrendous deeds throughout their lives. Most of their parents turned a blind eye to their antics. When the parent is tolerant of mean, inappropriate actions it lets the child evolve into more antisocial and destructive behaviors. Goodness has to be encouraged and badness has to be punished.

In our non-judgmental and tolerant culture, we emphasize the child’s beautiful smile and ability to speak intelligently. He avoids any responsibility for misdeeds by masterfully lying in a creative, cute and innocent manner. As this youngster matures into an adult these tendencies become part of his character. This art form of lying is becoming more prevalent and sophisticated by advertising, slick politicians, unethical professionals, Hollywood role models and significantly harried, permissive parents. They know they are being conned but why should they get upset or take time to correct it? The truth is a messy business that takes time, energy and righteous people who care about the world they leave behind.

Righteous people have been rebranded and derided by our progressive culture as hypocrites, and intolerant bigots. They are portrayed as mean spirited and cruel, unforgiving to others who have fallen on hard times. These moral individuals believe in personal responsibility for one’s actions. Excuses are not accepted.

This biblical, tough love formula has been the backbone of the US moral stability. Without it everyone does his “own thing” that leads to social chaos and dominance of the most wicked. In the “1980s drug epidemic” Nancy Reagan, wife of President Reagan, came up with the “Just Say No” slogan to curtail the rampant spread of drugs in our country.  She was unmercifully ridiculed. It did not end the use of illegal drugs but decreased the trajectory of it. The message was clear: excuses are a dime a dozen. “Just Say No” to drugs and you end your horrible drug addiction journey regardless of the temptation and threats.

In modern vernacular, it would be translated to “No one can bully you into taking drugs if you do not listen to them.” In other words, the “bullying” is a non-excuse for a person to absolve them from the stupid decision they made. The decision to obtain drugs and injecting them is the person’s responsibility. Any comments to the contrary are attempts to shirk their responsibility. No rationale could justify this behavior. The person is the victim of his own decisions and will suffer the inevitable consequences.

Returning the power of decision making back to the person ends the nonsense of others as bullying/forcing the individual into drug use. These potential drug users make voluntary decision that allow them to avoid this destructive route. Some addicts who heard this message still chose to use the powerful substance knowing it would seduce them to abandon their longterm thinking ability for short term pleasure. A person could end their nightmare by just saying “No” and bravely fighting through the withdrawl from drugs and regaining their functional life.

Tough love is not easy. It means a person has to say no to nasty people who are trying to encourage, tease, instigate or bully someone to do the wrong thing. By saying
“No,” it most often ends the bully’s shenanigans and he moves on to another softer touch. At worst, you speak to a friend or authority figure to help you stand firm and fight for your integrity. It is worth the hassle to protect one’s future, independence and moral values.

Voluntarily entering into slavery for immediate drug gratification, sex, high standard of living or any other reason is an obscene act. Surrendering one’s independence and freedom is evil to oneself.  Everyone has a duty to uplift others by example and deed. Without these inspiring role models, we will fall into despair and helplessness.

The hard and more painful path of saying “no” to mean associates is not easy to admit to oneself. Once it is done, freedom will again be in the person’s reach. Any individual, adolescent, young adult, middle age, or senior can make stupid decisions, but they can correct them with courage and honesty to speak their minds in a reasonable and forthright manner. Real friends will accept the apologies while phonies will attempt to ridicule the person to convince him he should maintain his self-destructive behavior.

Those who want to do you harm are never friends. Just get rid of them and their sick rationalizations to keep you dependent on them and their drugs.

Domenick Maglio, PhD. is a columnist carried by various newspapers, an author of several books and owner/director of Wider Horizons School, a college prep program. Dr. Maglio is an author of weekly newspaper articles, INVASION WITHIN  and a recent book entitled, IN CHARGE PARENTING In a PC World. You can see many of Dr. Maglio’s articles at www.drmaglioblogspot.com.