THINGS YOU DO NOT DO CAN BE MORE IMPORTANT THAN WHAT YOU DO

 THINGS YOU DO NOT DO CAN BE MORE IMPORTANT THAN WHAT YOU DO

By Domenick J. Maglio PhD. Traditional Realist

 

We bookmark in our brain many casual decisions we make that turned out well for us, For example we bought a lottery cards on our child’s birthday that won a sizeable prize. The decision to marry our high school sweetheart even though still in college worked out well although it was a leap of faith. The first car we owned that our friends admired is vividly imprinted in our memory. The great deal you recognized when buying a home or high paying job, which you obtained after graduating from college are pleasant memories. 

 

There are many actions we contemplate, then do that turn out well while others turn into a quagmire. There are many attractive offers, which after tortuously examining the pros and cons we decide to do or not to do. Upon looking in the rearview mirror of life we realize some were wise choices to avoid. Many that seemed too good to be true were just that. Some poor decisions  sidetracked us from reaching more long-term beneficial goals that we did not consider.

 

These choices may be as simple as not making material purchases. Many vacations are interrupted by slick sales agents who say you can enjoy the time you had at the resort again. They pressure you with different representatives who entice you to say yes and answer away every single doubt you had. Unfortunately, the fine print is usually different from the sales pitch. The happiness the couple originally felt later turns into a long-term nightmare. The unsuspecting buyer realizes he has been bamboozled after putting down a large sum of money for an agreement that is different from what he thought he signed. 

 

Searching for the right job is another important decision. Often the person is treated like a king during the interview. The monetary amount is often above expectations while the travel perks are outstanding. The applicant has several enticing possibilities but commits to accepting the position with seemingly everything he could wish for. The reality may turn out to be different than the picture painted. 

 

This new hire finds that playing politics is the means of moving up, not an excellent performance. There is less autonomy, camaraderie and prestige than he had on the previous job. He is making a hefty salary but is hating every minute on the job. The pathetic constant thought that goes through his mind is how long away is retirement. The job becomes an albatross around his neck. The money is too lucrative to leave although the job is poisoning her. It was not a good decision. In retrospect, it was an offer that should have been refused.

 

The common story of a person whose heart was broken is a reminder of what you want with your entire being could be the worst mistake of one’s life. After a period of sadness, the once broken- hearted individual learns many negative traits and deeds of the person who left. This knowledge allows them to realize that the individual they thought they loved was a deceptive phony and realizes the decision to break up was a blessing in disguise. 

 

Everything that happens to us is a learning experience. We can be depressed over where we are in a moment in life, which is counterproductive. Individuals should make choices long term learning to be more careful, less naïve and trusting. We need to train ourselves to make better choices. At the same time, we should look back to where we started to understand and acknowledge all that has been accomplished. Remaining in the self-pitying state is unproductive and self-defeating. We need to realize we are worthwhile and get back into living and not wallow in the past.

 

Once we start counting our blessings instead of material wealth, we become more emotionally stable. Our feelings about life brighten up since we did not comprehend how far we had come. It is more about how we serve others than taking advantage of others to increase our wealth and ego. The spiritual moral path places the individual in a better place for wholesome, future fulfillment. 

 

Many of the people who lived “the good life,” perhaps a glamourous one in a particular stage of life can be pitiful in another. A person may be lonely with no children, siblings or other companionship in the later stages of life. They remember all the underhanded things they did to get ahead. This person regrets their selfish choices rather than being proud of good ones

 

This self-promoting and self-serving person may appear as a semi-god to others. However, when reviewing the past, many would readily switch their personal agony for living a moral lifestyle in order to rest in peace. A person going down a path of immoral decisions has a heavy price to pay in later years, while the person who refuses to exploit others can close out their life in contentment and godliness.  

 

 

Domenick Maglio, PhD. is a columnist carried by various newspapers, an author of several books and owner/director of Wider Horizons School, a college prep program. Dr. Maglio is an author of weekly newspaper articles, INVASION WITHIN  and a recent book entitled, IN CHARGE PARENTING In a PC World. You can see many of Dr. Maglio’s articles at www.drmaglioblogspot.com.