IN CHARGE PARENTS REVERSE THE BULLYING DYNAMIC

IN CHARGE PARENTS REVERSE THE BULLYING DYNAMIC

By Domenick J. Maglio, Ph.D., Traditional Realist

Parents need to be “in charge” to demonstrate to their children that they are strong. This is essential for children need to know that their parents are strong enough to protect them from people who want to take advantage of them. They are the original and ultimate authority figures.

Parents lay down the foundation of respect for following the rules and learning to listen to adults. Every other authority figure in the child’s life such as teacher, police, minister and coach are or are not going to be respected depending on the authority the parents have established in the home.

Too many modern parents are over protecting their children from a lack of faith in their parenting skills and their youngster’s ability to mature into a courageous and independent person. This lack of belief in their child to grow into a formidable person becomes a self-fulfilling prophecy.

The reverse dynamic occurs when a child views the parent as weak. He realizes his parents do not possess the gumption to protect him. This uncertainty in the parent’s inner strength turns the child inward to handle his own affairs in an awkward or anxious manner. He has no back up.

An angry ungrateful child will seek out naïve, weaker ones to intimidate. If the target child does not pass the test in front of his peers, he will be relentlessly exploited. Unfortunately this child will probably not report this problem to his weak parents. He feels that the intimidator is stronger than his wimpy parent and realizes his parent will not do anything to stop it.

Too frequently in bullying situations, the “victim” (child) will duplicate what he experienced with the bully on another child. He will use what he learned from the bully on an even weaker child. This pathetic cycle of being abused and abusing others usually will continue until the child gets mentally strong enough to stand up to the bully.

The toughest appearing bully when confronted by a stronger person will react as a subservient “wimp.” A youngster that chooses to bully a more vulnerable child is an insecure individual. When a child becomes an emotionally secure person he or she has no need to torment others. This emotional strength is galvanized only when she stands down someone who tries to bully her.

It is the actions of the child that show he has had enough by refusing to take any more nonsense that stops the bullying game.

Once a wimp courageously stands down a bully verbally or physically confronting the bully, the child will no longer be considered a wimp to himself. He will no longer need to bully or be bullied. He will be more confident in his ability to handle his own battles.

In charge parents have inherent faith in their children based on their strong child rearing practices. They are parents who work hard to instill traditional values and thought processes into the minds of their child. Moderate spanking is employed when the child is in the toddler stage to get his attention and reinforce the parent’s knowledge of reality.

The reality-oriented parent understands that age and size differences between the peers should be reasonably close. This equalization of size and age eliminates many potential bullying incidents where the child would be at a severe disadvantage to stand up for himself. These strong parents will encourage their child to stand up to the bully since they realize the bully then and only then will leave him alone.

Knowing the bully will search out a weaker target so as not to be exposed as the coward he is. While the weak parent will teach that giving in is the best policy for their child with bullies. Parent’s interaction with their child sets the tone of how the child will perceive himself.

The reality is a bully is a wimp and a wimp is a bully depending on the circumstances.  Weak parents have a difficult time giving encouragement to their child to grow up. When parents are fearless in dealing with their child they are role-modeling strength.

This show of strength teaches the child the parent can protect him or her. It sets an expectation that the parent will be disappointed or upset if their child does not follow suit. The powerful parents develop stronger youngsters while the reverse is true for the wimpy ones. A parent who is confident is his child’s ability to handle his own problems empowers him.

An in charge parent has prepared his child to be strong whenever confronted by a bully. The children who believe in themselves present themselves in a competent and determined manner. Strong parents foster confidence in their children that naturally repels bullies.

Domenick Maglio, PhD. is a columnist carried by various newspapers, an author of several books and owner/director of Wider Horizons School, a college prep program. You can visit Dr. Maglio at www.drmaglio.blogspot.com.

REVISING OUR FOUNDING FATHER'S RELIGIOUS AND MORAL BELIEFS

REVISING OUR FOUNDING FATHER'S RELIGIOUS AND MORAL BELIEFS

By Domenick J. Maglio Ph.d. Traditional Realist

The progressive's obsession of justifying a secular society by denying the Judeo-Christian roots of our nation is blatantly absurd. This particular attempt at revising our history is a testimony that progressives will not be impeded by the facts. They just pound the lie into our minds through pseudo experts in the media, universities, and in our public schools. Eventually the historical lies became almost fact.

The only impediment to this propaganda is the actual words spoken by our founding leaders during the establishment of our nation. These learned men studied history and had the actual first hand experience of dealing with the oppression of the most powerful and corrupt political power at the time: Great Britain, headed by King George III.

These heroic men's words clearly stated that our constitutional republic can only be successful when its people are firmly grounded in religion and Christian, Judaic morals. They knew that citizens need strong virtues in an open and free society.

“We have no government armed with power capable of contending with human passions unbridled by morality and religion.” John Adams

“Religion and morality are the essential pillars of civil society.” George Washington

“Only a virtuous people are capable of freedom. As nations become corrupt and vicious they have more need of masters.” Benjamin Franklin

“Men, in a word, must necessarily be controlled by a power within them either by the word of God or the strong arm of men; either by the Bible or the bayonet.” Robert Winthrop

The evidence that colonial America in the late 1700s was a Christian nation led by men guided by Judaic Christian faith based belief system is undeniable and self evident. Most of our founding fathers came to America to practice their Christian religion without interference from government. Religious freedom in the new world was a primary motivation for the pilgrims forging a new life in uncivilized land.

The Pilgrims who arrived on the American shores were for the most part seeking religion and economic freedom. In 1607, Robert Hunt, an Anglican minister, founded Jamestown on the Virginia coast. The original charter for the Virginia colonies goal was the “propagating of Christian religion.” In 1620 the Mayflower established Plymouth colony, a faith based endeavor in what is today the State of Massachusetts. A third of the first arrivals on the Mayflower were of the Puritan sect know as Separatists. They separated from the Church of England and came to practice their religion freely. The Mayflower Compact contained the words, “in the Glory of God and the advancement of the Christian religious freedoms.”

There was not the slightest indicator that these men wanted to eliminate morals and faith from their daily lives. They came to live their beliefs. Roger Williams established a colony of faith in Rhode Island in 1640. He opened it to all religions for the belief that individuals have the right to practice their own faith. William Penn founded Pennsylvania Society of Friends, Quakers. George Calvert, Lord Baltimore, established Maryland as a haven for Catholics although Protestants made up a significant portion of the population. The Great Awakening was established by Jonathan Edwards in 1740s.

Our founding fathers were mostly of the Christian faith. Sam Adams was a devout Calvinist evangelist. His cousin, John Adams, stated he was a Christian. He was an independent thinker rather than a Deist or a Unitarian. There were amongst these principled men humanists, rationalists or deists but they were few in number in the Continental Congress. Almost all the delegates had been educated in Christian colleges and were influenced by general Christian principles. Our national monuments have inscriptions praising God and the majority of them prayed to God for guidance in making decisions.

Without these religious beliefs our Constitution would not be a Creator inspired document. It would just be another piece of paper written by ordinary men that would be readily altered for the benefit of the ruling class.

Judeo-Christian roots have nourished our soul as a nation. The only logical answer for these present progressive activist's attempt to rewrite a well documented history of the founding of America is to rip out its roots in order to transform it.

These radicals want an atheist secular society. They reasoned a country without religion would be more pliable to manipulate into a progressive nation.

The right to life, liberty and the pursuit of happiness could easily be erased as a right endowed by our Creator. The wall of separation between religion and governance can only make sense if these men did not have firmly ingrained morals and religion precepts.

The ridiculousness with the atheist progressive argument for a secular society is the fact that our founders were undeniably men who believed in the sanctity of the document they created.

America's survival as a nation depends on all citizens understanding our incredible blessings that have been derived from our daily practicing of the Word of God.

Domenick J. Maglio, PhD. Is a columnist carried by various newspapers and news sites, an author of several books and owner/director of Wider Horizons School; a college prep program. You can visit Dr.

Maglio at www.drmaglio.blogspot.com.