I AM WHATEVER I CHOOSE TO BE: THAT IS DELUSIONAL

I AM WHATEVER I CHOOSE TO BE: THAT IS DELUSIONAL

By Domenick J. Maglio PhD. Traditional Realist

You ask most pre teens or teenagers what they expect to have happen in their future and they tell you with an air of certainty, it is not what they want to happen but what is going to happen. These young people believe they can choose their future and “presto” it will happen.

This is understandable considering most have only to tell their parents what they demand and they receive it. “When I am 16 years old you will get me a new red V-8 Corvette.” There is no bargaining or pleading with their parents. These entitlement youngsters have been programmed to instantly choose and be granted whatever they want.

In the recent past people often talked about being a millionaire before they were 40 years old and expected to own their own upscale home. Many hoped to be a famous singer, doctor, politician or the CEO of a Fortune 500 company. These were dreams that motivated people to strive to do the exceptional.  They realize that these high expectations might never occur but they would give it their best shot.

On the road to their dreams many individuals did not want to pay the price to reach their objective. Many had moral values that held them back. Others changed their goals when they realized they felt more fulfilled doing something more suited to them. Most learned one’s path going through life was not a smooth, straight super highway but a twisting, turning and at times bumpy one. Reality still had a place in their heads.

Our present generation has been shielded from the harsh realities of life. Our youngsters have not directly sacrificed during our Middle East conflicts, deadly plagues or economic disasters. They live in an affluent bubble. Whatever they materially want after sufficiently nagging their parents, they get.

This certitude of expectations has now moved into another realm. It has moved from possessions and work to ones appearance and being. With the current modern science, growth, emotional hormones and cosmetic surgery has given the younger generations and their parents the belief that they can alter their being to be someone else. They can change their facial features, breast size, weight or height through surgery and drugs. They can instantly change their mental or emotional state by readily available prescriptions.

Currently children as young as three years old are insisting (through their parent’s advocacy) to change their gender. These parents believe the earlier the reassignment surgery, the less trauma the child will suffer in the transition from one gender to another. There is no scientific evidence to support this idea and plenty to oppose it.

Regardless of the success of the anatomical and hormonal change, it is impossible to predict how the child will feel about this artificial transition any time in the lifecycle. According to a 2008 study in The American Academy of Child and Adolescent Psychiatry, “most children with gender dysphoria (a mental disorder) will not remain gender dysphoric after puberty.”

There is no scientific or logical reason that prepubescent children should be allowed to suffer through this ordeal. Dr. Paul McHugh, former head of John Hopkins Psychiatry department viewed reassignment surgery as abuse. “We have a very radical and even mutilating treatment being offered to children without any evidence that the long term outcomes of it would be good.” John Hopkins Hospital has ended its transgender procedures. After reassignment surgery many people quickly return to a dysphoria mood remaining severely depressed and even suicidal.

Fifteen year-old students are not able to comprehend long-term consequences yet certain schools in Oregon are going to provide free reassignment surgery without any need for parental notification or approval.  Besides usurping parental rights it is beyond the scope of education and good health practices. These youngsters need significant and long-term mental health therapy not an extreme fanatical operation that would only add to confusion and pain to a mentally disordered youngster.

These youngsters will always know they were born one gender and were changed to another. The DNA will always remain the same substantiating the reality of what gender they were born.

We can choose to do many delusional things in our lives. The reality is that there are many things we cannot do. We cannot go back in time, pick a different family to be born into, stop all evil or dictate our future.

Not accepting the hand we are dealt is a recipe for internal conflict leading to a mental break from reality. These youngsters will face more, not fewer issues dealing with the reaction of others. They will always be freaks in the minds of many.

Delusional states have never been a means to happiness and mental stability.

Domenick Maglio, PhD. is a columnist carried by various newspapers, an author of several books and owner/director of Wider Horizons School, a college prep program. You can visit Dr. Maglio at www.drmaglio.blogspot.com.

THE MEDIA IS A TRAVESTY: IT SQUASHES FREEDOM

THE MEDIA IS A TRAVESTY: IT SQUASHES FREEDOM

By Domenick J. Maglio PhD. Traditional Realist

The United States no longer has an ethical reporting of the news. The mainstream media censors the news by selecting the stories that further the progressive agenda and avoid anything that contradicts it.  The majority of them believe they need to protect progressive leaders in order to radically change America.

These media people are the important “Fourth Branch of Government.” They have relinquished their duty and no longer see themselves as a check on all-abusive power. Now they are advocates of change to bring down traditional America. They want to replace it with an all-powerful centrally controlled, statist society. 

Recently the jovial doctor, head of the medical services of Planned Parenthood, was caught on video discussing harvesting of organs and body parts of aborted babies in a nonchalant manner while eating lunch. The investigative reporting was done by the research group, Center for Medical Progress. This hideous story was buried for several days. Then the state media took the company line that the video was doctored and out of context. They followed this failed attempt of appeasement saying the fetal organs were being used to advance science and the search for cures of disease. Finally the president of Planned Parenthood apologized for the tone of the doctor, but not the evil, brutal butchering of unborn babies done by this federally funded program. It became a non-story.

The seemingly purposeless shooting of Kate Steinle as she strolled with her father by a five time felon illegal immigrant was another story that the media chose to overlook. Once again they ignored the obvious dangers of the administration policy. After several days the state run media had to report the murder as an isolated event. The frightening fact of illegal felons roaming our streets was not explored.

The ridiculous avoidance of the Chattanooga, Tennessee attack on the recruiting office connection with Islamic terrorism is shameful. Our president immediately called the killing of five members of our military “domestic terrorism” without any questioning from the media.  The media attempted to portray the killer as a normal affluent American teenager. In fact he was 24 years old and had recently spent seven months in Jordan. His friends said he was different when he returned. The obvious inflammatory online statements aligning himself with radical Islam were reluctantly acknowledged. The media tiptoeing around the facts of this event are almost comical but indeed a shameful attempt to avoid the obvious conclusion.

The media and progressive politicians used the tragedy in Charleston, South Carolina where an insane young man, an addicted pill popper, killed nine upstanding black citizens to attack the historical Confederate flag after failing to stir up racial unrest. The overwhelming spontaneous white support for the victims transferred the target from the white people to the Confederate flag. This flag did not cause Dylann Roof to kill innocent churchgoers any more than his Nazi armband or his apartheid badges on his shirt. Roof was another severely mentally ill person on opiates who fell through the cracks of mental health services.

The same press who praises over and over again the burning of our flag as an expression of freedom of speech strongly pushed for the removal and elimination of the Confederate flag that the press saw as a symbol of hatred. It enhanced the narrative that all whites are racist.

While speaking to a predominately black audience Democrat presidential candidate, Martin O’Malley, made a true and innocent comment that “all lives matter.” He was booed and shouted down. In the same day he recanted his statement. The media did not raise the issue to him why white lives do not matter the same as black lives. This would have been as politically incorrect as O’Malley’s original comment.

The media neglects to evaluate the conflict between the right to exercise one’s First Amendment religious freedom and the anti discrimination against homosexuals. The progressive media strongly advocated for the homosexual side of this debate. This one sided view did not enlighten the public to this complicated issue. Instead the media used their power to control the discussion and establish a groupthink, herd mentality.

The state media has become the public relations arm of our progressive government. This should be frightening to all Americans on either side of the political spectrum.

Without an unbiased free press the USA cannot continue as a free nation. A press that acts as an advocate for a progressive agenda will squelch any opposition leading us on the road to a totalitarian government.

A free society with all its defects is better than an oppressive society without personal liberty.  

Domenick Maglio, PhD. is a columnist carried by various newspapers, an author of several books and owner/director of Wider Horizons School, a college prep program. You can visit Dr. Maglio at www.drmaglio.blogspot.com.

DON'T ACCEPT THE "NOT ME" GAME

DON’T ACCEPT THE “NOT ME” GAME

By Domenick J. Maglio Ph.D. Traditional Realist

The lack of parents’ ability to understand their own child's manipulation, deception and lies can be attributed to the shrinking of the family often to a single child. Small family size minimizes the lying issue as there are not numerous siblings to imitate the behavior and make it obvious.

Because of the lack of quantity time spent with their child and no other children to rat him out, too many parents believe that the child is always telling the truth. A beginning teacher learns to be more skeptical of children's stories after being burned by too many of them. Parents are often amusing to a seasoned teacher when they seriously tell the teacher, “my child does not lie.”

“Not me” is a spontaneous answer by a child to any question concerning misbehavior. “Did you leave these clothes on the floor?” “Not me,” even when the parent saw her. “Did you drop the vase?”  “Not me” before the question is fully stated.    

The problem for the modern parent to this “not me” response is the inability of the parent to believe their child can be such a convincing liar. They have insufficient time, motivation and energy to learn their child is deceptive and then discipline the child. Besides there is much guilt for not doing all the things their own parents did with them. They just want their children to like them.

There is little impetus for the parents tracking down the truth even when the parent saw with his own eyes that the child created the mess. It is easier to disregard the incident and focus on something more important to the parent. Time constraints limit modern parents from training their child from doing the right thing in the first place.

Modern children are also experts at not following directions. The child is automatically able to switch into the dumb act when cornered by the parent for being disobedient. This “game” is difficult to eliminate since parents do not have enough experience with their child to realize the child is playing them. Often it takes another adult to point out to the parent that the child is faking his inability to do the simplest task.

Other games that are familiar to modern parents are “I can't do it,” which really means, “I won't do it.” The “I forgot it” game normally translates into, “I didn't do it” or the procrastination game, “I waited until the last minute and then, I couldn't do it.” These are negative habits, which need to be reversed to establish a healthy attitude in becoming responsible.

These games are a variation of not being honest with self and others. They lead a child into not being accountable for his actions. He realizes his irresponsible behavior can be hidden by lying in different ways.

This tactic will continue to be employed until some authority figure confronts the child. This person has to convince the youngster his behavior is counter- productive. The person has to specifically point out how this dishonest behavior prevents him from developing into what he could become. The knowledge of these debilitating habits allows the young person to reverse his direction toward a more positive one.

Optimally this “not me” and other games should be stopped as soon as possible. This is why parents need to take initiative and the time necessary to eliminate it. It is essential to teach responsibility a building block of a healthy and productive life.

Disciplining one’s child is not pushing him away: it is the opposite. The gift of giving of one’s wisdom makes the child’s journey easier and better.

This experience of knowing one’s parents care enough to take the time to teach a moral lesson brings the child and parent closer together. This is the reason why after disciplining your child he wants to sit on your lap and hug you.

When he becomes a young adult and has a child of his own he will understand and thank the parent for teaching these tough lessons that helped him become an honorable person.

Domenick Maglio, PhD. is a columnist carried by various newspapers, an author of several books and owner/director of Wider Horizons School, a college prep program. You can visit Dr. Maglio at www.drmaglio.blogspot.com.

WORK IS A BLESSING NOT SOMETHING TO AVOID

WORK IS A BLESSING NOT SOMETHING TO AVOID

By Domenick J. Maglio, PhD. Traditional Realist

Almost magically when children are on a beach they begin to dig and build sand structures. They run with buckets of water moving sand from one spot to another making and filling in holes. They can run around for hours building sand castles and knocking them down. Even adults, who are just older kids, get involved making impressive sand sculptures that are washed away at night by the surf. 

What is one person’s work can be another person’s play. Renowned educator/psychologist, Maria Montessori observed this daily about children: work is play and play is work.  In the same way beauty is in the eye of the beholder.  Everyone does not view these various activities or jobs in the same manner.  The distinction about the pleasure or displeasure of an activity is in the perception of an individual.

A boring task for one person could be an enjoyable one for another.  A machinist putting together a simple gadget to handle a particular function can be seen as a work of art. Landscaping and mowing can be seen as drudgery or a gratifying experience of sculpturing one’s land, a spiritual experience.

Producing something is inherently gratifying. Ancient civilizations are judged by the artifacts that were crafted. Creating a functional organization that gets things done takes work to perfect in order to reach a high level of quality. This often becomes a person’s legacy.

Most intellectuals have a natural distain for any physical work. Work is for non-thinkers, laborers and peasants. According to these elites critical and creative thinking has altered our civilization replacing our need for manual labor. Technology and automation are on the verge of allowing everyone to be provided anything they desire in abundance. All humans will be liberated from having to use physical energy to produce what they need or want. This has been the mantra of intellectuals at least since the 1960s.

Work has practically become a negative concept in developed nations. These nations are opening up their borders to illegal immigration. This underclass is supposed to replace the former middle-working class, which supposedly is no longer willing to do such menial jobs. Many of the lower middle class are unmotivated to learn how to do simple repair and maintenance work around their homes.

Developed nations are forgetting that work has intrinsic value for humans. Being takers rather than tangible producers is like day and night. Takers may accept handouts although they have little appreciation for what they receive. They develop an entitlement mentality that craves more but does not have the appreciation or understanding of what it took to create it in the first place. Most importantly they do not feel the pride of current accomplishments and live in the past. Greece is an excellent example of this.

In American culture the concept of earning what a person gets is being undermined. “You did not build it,” as stated by President Obama set off a firestorm of protest.

People who worked themselves up the socio-economic ladder to unexpected heights were stunned and dismayed by such a statement. The Land of Opportunity is being denied by big government proponents who believe in the collective not individual initiative. It neglects the blood, sweat and energy needed to build and maintain a viable enterprise.

As a people we are losing our self-reliance. Many students work harder at not working rather than just doing the task right in the first place. Time practically stops when a person chooses to watch the clock until they can leave their workplace. This wasted time cannot be replaced.

Energetic and vital people are the backbone of a thriving nation. Work is a natural antidepressant.  When people are busy doing they have no time to worry about what they cannot control. As the old saying goes, if you want something done, give it to a busy person. These people know how to focus on completing an objective that increases their energy to tackle another project.

Work that is meaningful is something to relish. It gives the person a purpose and the satisfaction of accomplishment.  Doing meaningful things naturally creates a balance between the body, mind and spirit. It is a blessing that should be embraced, not avoided since it keeps us vibrant.

Domenick Maglio, PhD. is a columnist carried by various newspapers, an author of several books and owner/director of Wider Horizons School, a college prep program. You can visit Dr. Maglio at www.drmaglio.blogspot.com.